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{Saturday, January 11, 2003}

I'm feeling all motherly tonight explaining being a "good sport" to the girls playing a memory game on the dining room table. Wow. Am I really that old? Of course, it *was* to no avail because Emma left in disgust to put on her pajamas and Morgan is under my desk screaming.

I was in the grocery store last night and was on my way out. I passed the customer service desk which had a sign for Western Union. It said, "Send money. Live life!" Sending someone my money is an affirmation of my life? It will add fulfillment to my life? I don't quite get it. I can't stop pondering what that could mean.

We had grocery-store-ready roasted chicken tonight. Harley received some bones post-meal. Shortly thereafter I heard him upstairs singing his dog song to the bone gods.

We had Emma & Mommy chatting-time last night. Tonight Steve put her to bed and she asked for me to go up (Morgan has been having breakdowns in 40 minute intervals). I went up right after and she was smiling when I got up there. I hopped into bed with her and she said, "Can we have mommy chatting every night until she's four?" I said that we could have chatting every night until she (Emma) is 20. She picked four because I've started putting Morgan to bed downstairs in Grammy's bed because she freaks every night after chatting time is over and ends up keeping Emma awake. I told them that Morgan just wasn't old enough yet to go to sleep upstairs so far away from the parents.

Emma said that she had a very good question. She had several actually. One was: How come the same voice is on every phone? The next was: Does every t.v. show the same show at the same time? She had a bad dream last night about being at the school during the dark with Rebecca.

Morgan was a PMS mess today. Everything was sooooo sad. She was sad that she had weaned. She was sad that her bird wasn't getting on the ladder she picked out. She was sad she hadn't held her bird today. She was sad that cold air was coming in the window. She was sad that Emma was building a doll roller coaster. She was sad. She told Steve, at bedtime, that "this house is no fun". Ay-yi-yi. Don't grow Morgan, I'm sure you're adolescence will kick my ass.

I actually listed auctions today, despite my extreme laziness. Sophia came over for a while when Michelle when to an appointment. I kept her two extra hours, as she and my girls were playing (fairly) well and kept M & E from brawling all day long. I'll have to get Victoria and give her equal opportunity because I'm sure she was frothing that S. was here during that time.

I'd let Daisy become sleepy and I still need to wretch her from her cage and give her the medicine. and dangit, she's all settled on her swing, where I'd like for her to sleep. She's been sleeping on her waterdish, sideways, shitting on the perch behind her all night. Needless to say, my morning routine has been altered to blasting her dish first thing and getting it cleaned up. Man, small birds have some metabolisms. Mom had to import some newspapers for me.

Steve is on his third week of illness. He's had 9 hrs. sleep in the last 72 hours. He's a wreck. He doesn't seem to think so though. Probably halicinating, hell, who wouldn't be? He needs antibiotics but he doesnt' have a doctor and he's unwilling to go and *spend time* at a doctor's office when the plant could need him. IF he's home tomorrow, I'm going to work on him and try to get him to consent to at least going to the flying malench brothers on Monday. Heck, he might not even have to go in. Sounds like he's starting on a cough now. Probably bronchitis.

posted by Lisa 8:04 PM

{Wednesday, January 08, 2003}

I walked into the gym today and my stomach jumped up to my throat. *PLANE CRASH* was on all of the tv's and the girls flight had taken off thirty minutes prior. The giant gasp moved along immediately when I saw that it was the other end of the country. PHEW. And other plane crashed today in Turkey. Bad day.

Emma, tonight at dinner, said, "Mom, I just don't know why my brain thinks all of the time!" and I said, "It's because it's growing and learning and it takes a lot of thinking to do so much at once." She said, "I just don't know why it does that." It was more reflective than questioning. She was quiet about The Sisters being gone. Morgan was more vocal with breakdowns and sorrow. "I wanted Jennifer to be here when I got up...." :( It's harder this time (for me at least) because I can't say, well - you'll see them at this time.... I don't know when we will see them again so I can't make up anything like that.

The new bird is adjusting a little at a time. I opened one of her cage doors and she sat on top of her cage for a bit today. She also ate like a maniac when I moved her pellets to the top of the cage. She's been eating rice aplenty since I gave it to her last night as well. She did a little flying tonight into the living room and I guess Coco finally noticed. He gave her the big/little eye when I carried her back through -- like: what IS that thing? She squacks and paces her perch when she wants something. When we were eating (before moving her food dish) and at night when she's tired and wants to be covered. Harley is still convinced he MUST get to her and still cries in longing.

Busy, but interesting, day yesterday when Steve's Mom and sister (and nephew) came to visit for the day and see Jen and Stephanie. I took Emma out of school early and kept Morgan out of Kids' Kamp. We stayed here all day, talking, talking and eating apparently, by the size of my rotund belly.

It was 63 today. Very nice. Emma's class had a field trip outdoors and it was perfect for that. Apparently the next few days will be Frosty, so we will pay. It was nice while it last though. I was the Kindergarten helper today, while Morgan stayed with Michelle. She was so impatient to go and play with Lola, but she (L.) had been sick all last night, so she slept all day. Morgan was disappointed but happy to be with Michelle.

posted by Lisa 9:38 PM